(Instrumental) ShadowZtar: Yeah, we're getting into it again! Y'all thought we was dead, huh? It's over for you bitch niggas! I've got my niggas MC Mar T, DJ Theodore, Rob the Knob Slobba, and lastly but not leastly, Joey Meatballs! (Laugh) God damn nigga, this is some tight as sheet right here beetch! All y'all crews better start disbanding right now, cause it's about to go down! Dogscast Crew bitch! Play that fucking tape!

Robbie Pastrami: It's the Dogscast Crew, going hard as bamboo, You say we can't rhyme, but that ain't true. As rappers we grew, here's our debut. You should've withheld your shitty review, cause rap's what we do, from the beats we use, to the lyrical cues, making classical tunes. Just watch how we move, we perpetually improve! Try and catch the words we rhyme and fuse. You can try and produce, but your shit sounds loose. Can't protect you from my lyrical abuse. It's hysterical, are you amused? Put your neck in my noose. Your talent must be renewed, but for my Crew, it's imbued. Your shit sounds subdued, I don't mean to intrude. As I conclude, I don't mean to be rude, but your songs sound crude compared to my rhymes I've accrued. Making beats' Theo's job, but hey I'm Rob, I like making songs while pulling on my dong. You think I'm wrong, but my buddy Shadow says "bing bong!" You owe me for my flow, ain't no Joe Shmoe, in this hoe! It's the Dogscast Crew!!!

(Instrumental) MC Mar T. Yeah... Alright, get ready to lose! Yo yo yo, I'm Steven Universe! and I'mma knock you out by the third fuckin' verse! Stop by my ditch, that I throw you in the hitch, It's just a little twitch that I have, to throw dumb bitches out of their habitat! Wanna hear you bitches say, "I love Morty, and I hope Morty loves me, I'd like to rap my arms around him, and feel him inside me." Me me me me me.... DJ Theodore: God damn right. Yo my name is Theodore, only known for closing doors, Just got back from doing chores, so I'm gonna read some lore... Let's see, I can't really rap, but at least you see me trying, One day you'll look at me and see that I'm a diamond, You know you're pathetic when you're only known for something, Just like my man Doug E. said, you ain't doing "Nuthin'!" (Instrumental)

MC Mar T: Goin to school- Goin to school- Goin to school, tryna get an education. Reading the words in the citations, learning about biology, and a miosis, while you sit and complain about tuberculosis, cause [when I was 5 years old,] I had [scoliosis!] I'm furiocious, never gonna stop, cause I'm atrocious! If you get me, prescribe in doses! Cause if you don't, you'll get vibrosis. Okay... Workin at Ross, and TJ Maxx, and I got my uniform covered in [wax!] Supposed to be saving up for a car, but instead I'm ordering Yu-Gi-Oh cards! DJ Theodore: [Inhale] Ye-ye-ye-yeah, so In case you didn't know, my name is Theodoe, I just came here to ruin the beat. Incase you didn't know, I'm not rapping, I'm just kinda... acting like it! So... actually... My name is Theodoe, doe-doe, doe-doe doe! I am getting bored... of this fuckin beat, To... listen to... my name is Do! I do the do! Theodo... he does the do! *Beatbox noises* [So fresh!]

[It's ya boy... The king!] [He was 6 foot 2!] x2 MC Mar T: Yo, yo, yo, the name is Marty! Don't mean to brag, but I can party! But don't bother showing up if I'm tardy, cause 7 I start to get a little bit farty. I live in Cali, and Lakewood too! But don't track me down, cause I'm doing the do! And I got more rhymes than the whole damn coups... crew! O.K... I can go on from here to the zoo! Let me tell you, about my little situation, Join the school, tryna get an education, Learning about English and multiplication, I'll date any girl, except for an Asian. But hey, lemme tell you a little thing when you mess with me, you mess with the [KING!] O.K... So if you listen to my beats, you'll be here for awhile, Cause I can rap from here to the Nile, Don't believe me, then you're in denial, Tryna diss me, and I'll lay you like a tile, Tryna fight me, and I'll add you to the pile, Tryna call me, better hurry up and dial. Bitch! DJ Theodore: Ye-ye-ye-yeah, so, My name is Theodore, like you heard it before, We rap [so fresh!] so just listen to more, Catching up on some lore, fucking a couple whores, I got so many chores that I don't have time to rap, You mess with the [KING!] [O.K...] This beat, sounds a little fuck-ing stupid, so why don't we change it [like this!]

MC Mar - T: Dude, I have 42 seconds left to finish processing... I'm so FUCKING EXCITED! Check it out... Fuck Theodore. His name is Theodore, he smells like pee odor, He got all dressed cause he went to the theater, He's got a... hot date. Watching a flick that he knows he'll hate, And he didn't masturbate on the off chance, that they will mate. The next night, Theo hops on his PC, says "Hi" to Robert and me, Says "Hey guys... Look at my girl" then he did a little twirl, Obviously though Theodore's head was in a whirl. After me and Robbie laughed, he got all red and mad, Cause he knew that his girl looked bad, and he wishes that he hadn't had, fucked her, after the first night, but he spent the night, like an idiot, dumbass. And he gives us sass, like we're supposed to put up with his jazz. How's that? [I can't understand a-] [Lemme tell ya story of my situation] You've... got what I need, But then again, so does she. And she, and she, and she. Now that I think about it, Theodore's kinda desperate. He settled with the worst, I mean she kinda looks, like a horse. And then it goes to: "[Slow down baby!]" Was in his head, "Ok, baby!" is what he said, "I just thought that maybe-" She cut him off, "Bitch, who the fuck you think you is? Pussying out, just like this? It's a date you will fucking miss!" "Ok, ok, nevermind!" It was obvious Theodore was in a bind, He was just a little blind, but me and Rob paid no mind! [Oooh...]x4

[Pastramiamiami, come get some for your mommy!]x3 Robbie Pastrami: You can not get paid, I can get laid... My name is Robbie Pastrami, make ya mom suck on my salami, she kinda like it. Call me Rob... I'm no slob, bob on my knob like it's corn on the cob. Bobbin like it's ya job... Like a hoverboard, underneath my feet. Obsolete, return to Amazon. Now I'm a king, nigga. Bitch. [Pastramiamiami, come get some for your mommy!]x2 DJ Theodore: I found you, Ms. New Booty, Bring it together, and bring it back to me. Hip, hop, the hippy, the hippy, to the rhythm of the boogidy beat. Now what you hear is not a test, I'm rhyming, over the beat. [Say what?] Robbie Pastrami: I don't mean to say that word, it's disrespectful, and I am white, it's absurd. I apologize, I do not want to be racist. I don't want to get on an opportune basis. [Doesn't it just make sense?] Robbie Pastrami: Call me - Robbie Pastrami, bob on my knob and pretend it's salami, this is my job-by, makin money, hoverboard under-neath my - feet, obsolete, it's absurd, that - I am white, I do not, want to be so bright, But I - I don't want to get into a - fight, you little trike. I will punch you - in ya dumb stupid microphone. I - don't wanna hear that I don't make no sense. I know that I make zero sense. I'm just Robbie Pastrami, ami-ami- ami, come get some for ya mommy, I don't - wanna hear it, I want to wear it. [Scannin while ya plannin ways to sabotage me.] MC Mar - T.: Yeah, his rhyming's pretty good. Robbie Pastrami: This makes no sense, but I don't give a shit. I'm invince.

Rob: Yo, you see that ****** over there on produce, what's his name? "Robbie pastrami" Robbie pastrami...? Nah. My name is Rob No-car-o, I will borrow your car 'til tomorrow, put you in sorrow, with my ****** Marty... Just kidding. I'm at stop n shop, gonna make you shop... Gonna make a beat drop, ******, make everyone in the hood go crazy, Cause they know this ******'s from Hamden, CT. No sense in this, your beat is tight, no one give a fuck about the lyrics. [You jump around, act like a fool Some think it's kinda dumb, but I think it's cool.] I don't give a fuck about my lyrics imma listen to my beat on my headphones, beats headphones. Beats by Dre, I hear them every day, They sound really nice, I'll put you in some spice, I come from Hamden, I make a couple hun'nid, Now I live in Southington, CT, Isn't that, piece of shit? I don't give a fuck, Imma mumble rap with my stuff, Idgaf. [Mother fucker comin to me, on the street... You... ain't gotta come at me like this- Motha fucka I don't give a fuck what you do!] ****** what that mean, I don't give a fuck, I don't mind, I don't give a fuck, I don't-I don't give a fuck, I'm not using my vape today, I don't give a- That's all you care, I can't compete,

Lanko D: Getting called as Uncle Lance, by my Italian friends when I hip-hop dance. Don't compete with me 'cause you don't have a chance, I like to wear... super fresh brands. Nike shoes, and some Adidas pants or "Nikeys" as we say it in the Netherlands but the name "Uncle Lance" is no good now I think about is Italian food Gonna take a better name, sorry my dude. The name Lanko D is better for me than Uncle Lance, don't you agree? Now I'll rap in Dutch and you will see: Hey hoe gaat het wat is er nu versta je niet als je aanspreek met u nou daar raak van overstuur en nu ga ik weg want de muziek is duur!

[You jump around, act like a fool some think it's kinda dumb but I think it's cool] DJ Theodore: The highly, regarded, massively retarded, (x3) They know who I be. Yo, my name is Theo-doe, I mean Emcee Teddy, that's my alter e-go. I pull up a file called Chico's Groove, got to get up and get my body to move. Feeling too paranoid, I need some food, but first I turn around and I hijack a mech.

DJ Theodore: Ayo I be like- Experimenting with this shit. Oh who's it? Former drunk emcee who goes by the name of Teddy. Top of the world Now I got my shit together, Went through eighteen years wishing for some cold weather. Whether you like it or not, I'm a come out on top, and yell from the rooftop [Say what?] I got dreams, I got bitches, build some bridges have some visions. Competition? Ahaha, I got none Well maybe a little. But hold on, I'm not done, a new city? Shit.. be like Grand Theft Auto, Wish my name was Niko, then I hit the lotto, Shit.. I ran out a lyrics.

M.C. Mar - T.: Eating at Robbie's! makes me look like Bobby! From King of the Hill, I gotta sell my house when I pay the fuckin' bill! Eating this slop makes me feel like Mad Hatter, They put hormones in the food so I'll get fatter! Outside the lot they got 2 or 3 hounds, I swear they fuckin' ran Taco King out of town! [Will the stupid fat faggot pick up his shit stained tacos?] Fuck you!

Lose my phone, my wallet, and my keys, gotta find my cash, sifting through the trash, that's to my knees, don't hurt me please. I float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. Sure I may be stinky, dick is rinky-dinky, washing dishes over the sink-y. Switch the beat up, can't get picked up unless it's by the dumpster. The cold metal abductor. Riddles on my forehead, walking with my friend Ted, eyes still itchy and red. Don't wanna be bitchy. I snorted 3 adderal, shouldn't be a dad at all. My brain goes to overhaul, goin' insane, can't hardly contain. Look at your tits, sorry I can't retain, the feeling in my main vein. Don't slap me bitch, let me ex-plain: It wasn't hard, all I had to do was steal Ted's credit card, and pass it to the bodyguard at boulevard. (Laugh) Hold on... It wasn't hard, all I had to do was steal Ted's credit card, and pass it off to the bodyguard at boulevard. Please Ted disregard, I'm a retard. (Laugh) Walk 8 miles with a chair on my head, I don't care, it's for my friend. We's together to the end. A-At least I hope so... Got his pin number, I wrote it down in his slumber, My roommate has an accent, but I can't pay rent. Can I get an extent? I can't live in a tent. Also would you consent to a sexual event? Do you like my scent? You... make my cock hard like cement. It's charred. Get kicked out of bars, I smoke ciggy butts. Smash the entire car. Sorry for my vulgarity, I will never give to charity.

Sean T: -too, so they can hear it. Crank it. Aight, yo, aight... DJ Theodore: Here we go! Sean T: Let me listen to it drop, Yo it's Sean T., coming through, I tell you I'm hot. I tell you that I'm not, I don't even give a fuck what you got, Punch you in the mouth, punch you in the chest, punch you in the... DJ Theo: Something! ... Sean T: Aight, restart it. I already got it. I don't even give a fuck, ****** fuck you out, Because I'm gonna come and fuck you and your fuckin crowd, Because I'm comin through, I'mma do what I do, Because I'm pullin dush dush right out the fuckin boot, Gonna fuckin take a blunt, and I'mma smoke that too Motha fucka I don't give a fuck what you do, Because I'm comin and I'm runnin, I'm gunnin and I'm comin, and I'll add your fuckin peoples, and I'm comin, and I'm gunnin, I'm runnin, I'm comin, I'm comin your way, with the AK motha fucka don't get hit with this fuckin stray, Cause I'm comin and I'm riggin your way, [?] Because I, gotta get that while I be this way Because I, gotta hit it up, gotta spit it up, if you wanna- Tara: Hey we're going right now if you want to ride. We're going now. Sean T: I'll be back. DJ Theo: Aight Sean T: Yo, that just made me put some shit in my mind. DJ Theo: Aight, be ready. Sean T: Heh, I will be ready. Yo, you know... the last time I spit- Song 2: (Instrumental) DJ Theodore: I added a hook to it this time! Sean T: ...2, 3, 4. Uh. Yo. Bust run a run away, Sean T. comin ya way. Motha fucka, get hit with a fuckin stray, I don't give a fuck if you on the streets, Because I never retreat, and my fuckin fans seek feet, I don't even give a fuck, cause my feet never move, Sean T comin through with the big truck, Hit you up, hit you with the buck, I don't give a fuck, you-you a lil fuckin truck, That's right, I'mma roll your ass over like Grave Digger bitch, you a fuckin ass-over. I don't even give a fuck, 6 feet deep. Sean T comin through with a little heat. That's right. Hit you with the pump, make you fuckin grunt. Sean T comin through with the pump I don't even give a fuck what you gotta say, Sean T comin ya way, you better run away Rollin with the AK, runnin, comin ya way, I don't give a fuck if you get hit with a fuckin stray, That's right it's still gonna kill ya, put the barrel in ya mouth, dem mah feel ya [?] That's right I don't give a fuck, bitch. Sean T comin through, suck this dick, I don't even give a fuck, just take it to the tit. Don't drip a little bit on my Timbs, motha fucka- Mother fucker comin to me on the street... You... gotta come at me like this! Sean T gonna show you how to spit this! If you wanna fuckin keep it fuckin fluid I'mma motha fuckin show you how to do it like a student Cause I'm gonna 'come a teacher, motha fucka like an English teacher. Stupid motha fucka, bitch, I'mma beat ya That's right, smack you in the mouth, Turn your mother fuckin ass out like a house. That's right, cause I do this shit motha fucka I be on this shit, like i'm on ya bitch, That's right, cause she on the tit, Motha fucka, takin it to the tit, Don't drip a little bit. I don't even give a fuck Suck on this shit. Nah, I don't know. I fucked it up. DJ Theo: Hahaha. That's fine, bruh. Sean T: I had something going, but, it was gone. Haha DJ Theo: Good job, bruh, good job!

Robbie Pastrami: No man's land! Pleasin', squeezin', slot box'm'box... I.M. box? IM box! Dig-na-ty! You're just black! I feel like such an ass. I feel like such an... Alright fuck you. I go boom-bap, with my rap, roll the weed into the sack, pass it off to Marty, gives the boy a heart attack, Straight face slap, like mace to the eyes, don't act surprised, with the way the beat is synthesized. Theo's wise, make them others cry, make them ask why? as we crack into your fine girl's thighs. Deception and lies, I'm the prize, makes your perception cloudy. With your girl from Saudi... Arabia? Is she even dating ya? My cock's in her jaw, you shoulda saw this comin', no need for you to be cuttin', your wrist Got your girl twist, as I kissed on her body, I got a list for when she act naughty. What's your name, Scotty? Well your girl's a hotty. Alright I need to write the next part. MC Mar T: Rob, gimme the mic! Consider this a hostile takeover! I see your nasty combover behind your bodyguard's shoulder! So why don't you come over, while you're at it, bend over! Cause I see your ass, pucker up, like a four leaf clover! Robbie Pastrami: God damn, you sound like Sam, Mary's little lamb, let me clear my diaphragm, I'll hit you with the spam, just like Derek. I'm scammin ya, clawin at ya wallet, ya bank account, I be stallin it. Can't tell the amount. DJ Theodore: Without a doubt, Scoutin ya loutin ya dally- dally-ya doubtin ya do- And that's all. [that's all] The kids used to tease, now I'm hiding in the leaves, of the trees, ****'s school, I grab 'em by the pale throat. ShadowZtar: Swag, swag, punch a bitch! (x3) Video games, anime music, warlock, mage, I don't give a shit. I am too busy tryna stay elusive. Watch where you're going, or else you'll get hit. Swag, swag, punch a, bitch! Stop asking me! Robbie Pastrami: Pleasin', squeezin', slot box'm'box Pleasin', squeezin', slot box'm'box Alright, here comes the third one: Pleasin', squeezin', slot box'm'box I.M. box?

[I float like a butterfly, sting like a bee-] MC Mar T- Oh, this is pretty good. You wanna hear it? It all started in Theodore's room, took your friend's meds, not very hip. Snorted it with a dime, and went on a trip. It gave you quite a spook, one shot of adderall is all it took. Snort it, horde it, and-a look, he woke up in a cold sweat. He was out on the streets, Theo could bet, he was confused, dazed, navigating doubt, through the town like a maze. Holding Theodore's bike, he went on a hike, and got kicked out of his brother's place. All he could remember was Theo's mic. Right before he snorted a state, almost felt like his brains weren't on the plate, for him, the Earth closed its gate, the adderall left him blind? [Laughter] Yes! The adderall left him blind, behind the dumpster he, hit the hive. Now all he could remember was Theo's warning, now he finds it quite alarming, and one little thing ruined his groove, and now his roommate yells at him to move. Ditched my friend's ride in a ditch. He ditched my friend's ride in a ditch, at this point, he looks kind of like a bitch. Even Theodore wanted him to hitch, he was passed out. [Inaudible] Slept on the couch. Like a [Inaudible] He was lucky to be alive. He thought his brain belonged to the hive of bees by the dumpster Now he feels like a monster, but not really. If he was in a wheelchair, he would do a wheelie! [Hysterical laughter] Dude, that was really good! No, no, no, but I really like that line. "But not really, if he was in a wheelchair, he would do a wheelie!" [Laughter] His eyes were bloodshot red the adderall had gone to his head, Nothing could help, not even his bed. His eyes sidelined, it was kind of scary, and very late, because he was scheduled for work the next morning, he ate all the cereal he was hoarding and took the bus to his job. Ah, dude, that rhymes. Dude, I need to end it where he, like, dies. [Hysterical laughter]

ShadowZtar: Alright, Marty needs to stop playing though, first of all. Otherwise I can't get into the groove. MC Mar - T. God... ShadowZtar: Sorry...sorry. *laugh* *sigh* Howdie do, buckaroo? It's Shadoi, the Wapoi, Try & attack my reputation get your fucking weave split I've got the Amen break in me blood, All of me suckas get done, It's like this and like that, Roll up a fat sack Give me a lot of that, for my back, Take that, and that, again Strolling on down, through the streets With the NEETs, I'm elite, indeed If you ask me for some money, there'll be debt to pay. Take a step, that-a way. Catch me eating some chips from Lays Chips-a-hoy boy, 'ey [Oi vey] Drinking some chardonnoi, I'll beat ya till ya black & blue, haven't a clue, Whyming through the beat like zig zag zoo, Howdie do...

Thank you for using this quality AT&T product. To record a message on your answering machine, insert the AT&T Telephone Tunes answering message tape into your home cassette player, and cue up the desired message. Placing the built in microphone of your answering machine six to twelve inches from your cassette player's speaker, simply record your chosen message, as you would your own voice. Have fun! Robbie Pastrami: They call me the King Kong, come slob on my knob. Come suck on my cock, just call me Rob. I hate my job, I've got this manager named Matt, He's pretty fat, makes me wanna go on a knack, 'til I punch him in his back, and call him a sad sack. He'll think twice before he gives me shit, cause he knows he'll get hit. Make his girl sit, on my dick. I won't call her. Fall asleep in my chair, customers make me pull out my hair. They can tell that I don't care, hear 'em utter, "This ain't fair!" Make 'em stut-ter, pull out my box cut-ter, I'm the blade strut-ter, try to maintain composure. Cause this verse gives 'em closure, but it makes me dolla. Corporate comes into this store, just to holla, MC Mar T: "You look bored." Robbie Pastrami: You... forgot to put an H in here, hold on. There we go, Here comes the horde of phone drones, who's gonna get ignored. In my brain, I imagine them gored. Hear my boss start raggin, roll my eyes, Make me wanna turn my badge in, make my head spin, I just wanna go home, drink gin until I'm in a coma, Fall on my back, slam your face all the way to the South. I wanna group chat with the gang, the rap pack's back. These customers are whack. Get out my face with your smelly tooth plaque. Strap up, my snapback. Chuck up, my middle finger, while you linger. Cunnilingus! [It's the Dogscast Crew!] Fuck y'all, I'm out. [Oops I said, on my dick, I ain't really mean to say on my dick, But since we talkin bout my dick-] x2 MC Mar T: Marty's back! And just like Rob said, "We perpetually improve." [-petually improve, petu-petually improve.] We fillin' that groove, cause we're always in the mood. Chillin' with Rob, and his mob, and a guy named Bob. [Say what?] I bet you think it's funny, but try and go to sleep while you still owe me money. While you're calling for mommy, you got something else coming, honey. Cause we got perfect pitch. Anyway, the song's about to end. Bitch! [Bitch...! Bitch...! Bitch...!]